the station

February 20, 2009

he found that he would rather stay in the station
in the realm of possibility
than actually board a train
he knew it like the back of his hand
and could carry it with him, inside him
with all of its trains, paths, and destinations
the still point from which all paths emerge
this point was inside him and wherever he was
he could find it, in him
if he took a moment to be quiet
if something was happening around him
that illustrated one of his theories
he could find it and the dimestore epiphanies would start to roll
and he would know that he was healed
he was okay, and, in some way yet to be fully grasped
on a journey, on some kind of path
or at least knew, deeply
that he could follow a train of thought

but to know that you can follow a train of thought
or board a train of thought is not to actually do it
it is a narcotic, gnostic petulance
pestilence, to hold onto that knowledge

the above
you know of course
that all you are doing
in the above is describing the station.

the question is: can you move on?
No, the question is: which train?

all the trains leave
all the meanderings begin
the point was in him

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